Blank Stare or blank stare?
What a difference a few days can make in the life of a writer! What a difference it makes to the meaning of a blank page… I sort of feel like I’ve fallen off a cliff, but in a good way.
I know that doesn’t make sense, but stick with me here. I’ll try to explain.
As you know, I made my official switch from work-a-day guy to sparkly-glowy-consultative-entity-at-large last Friday. It was also the day I proclaimed that I was dedicating myself to writing.
Since then, I’ve written not one word of creative fiction. Not one. I’m ok with that for the moment, because I’ve been writing proposals. My proposals are not like other people’s proposals. They are opportunities to educate. They are mini-articles which are in fact raw copy for a book I am assembling on eCommerce.
I’ve also managed to write a few blog posts, like the one called “Why King Moonracer is My Hero”. I’m still working out this which blog gets which post thing. That should settle out soon, so don’t fret about it.
Still, one thing I’ve noticed is that Blank Pages are now just blank pages.
The Blank Page
When you’re starting out, writing becomes serious. So serious, you may end up writing millions of words (like me) or being paralyzed by the white expanse of the Blank Page (like me too).
I’m sure this happens to pros too, but the impact of the Blank Page on an amateur is quite different.
You may be frustrated. You may be angry. You may howl at the moon or curse the Elder Gods (you do the latter at your own peril, don’t say you haven’t been warned)… but no one starves.
Becomes a blank page
Just because I put a flag in the ground and said — “I AM A WRITER FOR REAL” — doesn’t make me one. I’m not on the verge of starving either. However, I suddenly feel quite free but also driven with a sense of purpose.
I don’t feel frenzied or pressed. I don’t have a deep hunger tearing at my soul. I’m not feeling hesitant or unsure. I’m not worrying about plot or fighting the urge to flip everything around and start over. I feel complete.
The Blank Pages are gone, and I’m writing.
Jumping from Page to page
At the moment, this is probably the best I can do in explaining what’s different besides saying “it’s different.”
Parenthood is like this. You see people who are expecting for the the first time and they look so innocent, so happy. They should be of course but really they have no idea what they’re in for. If you try to tell them, you look like a lunatic.
So maybe I seem a little crazy right now to you.
Of course, if you’re an experienced hand, you’re probably nodding and maybe laughing at the child exploring his new world and suddenly realizing just how scary big it is.
Either way, I’m glad to provide the entertainment.
I’m going to keep notes on this feeling and see how it changes over time. I’ll report back occasionally on this topic and let you know if it fades or if it only multiplies.
For the moment though, let’s just say that there’s a big difference between a Blank Page and a blank page — and I like it!
YOUR TURN: Have you experienced the difference between Blank Pages and blank pages? If so, how has it shaped your writing experience?